Billy Mays is no longer with us but his spirit has visited my transmission.
In the quest to remove unnecessary equipment and weight from the truck, I took off the Power Take Off unit (PTO). As you can see, I used my Barbie duct tape to cover the opening until I could locate the replacement PTO cover plate. One must cover the opening; I didn’t want any illegal aliens to get in much less any water or foreign bodies.
Last week I was proudly showing of my master mechanic craftsmanship to another car aficionado and was turning the drive train to show how well everything fit together. Halfway through the turn I felt it tighten up. The little voice in my head said “this is not good”, even my friend noticed and pointed it out. I turned it a few more times and while it did turn through the tight spots, I was concerned. However I decided to use the advance mechanic Ostrich method of altered reality and pretend that nothing was really wrong.
Later that week I took off the protective duct tape as I had successfully located and purchased a PTO cover plate and felt safe that nothing was going to get into the transmission. A business associate was over for dinner one evening, Sam Adams from Boston, this is not his real name since we need to protect his identity. Sam and I were checking the truck fluids and I use illegal high test SAE 30 IPA. Mr Adams has two boys and if they knew how many quarts of IPA we used, well….. Now this is where it gets fun, I am turning the drive train and something sticks out of the transmission opening.
Okay, this is interesting. I carefully turn the drive train and a whole plastic bag exudes from the transmission. Where did this come from?
Well that explains the tightening when I was turning the drive train. As my memory started to focus I remembered putting a plastic bag in the PTO opening before I sealed it with the pink duct tape. I was just trying to be extra careful when trying to seal the opening.
But wait, there it more!!!
I just happened to notice another illegal immigrant in the transmission. A second bag was caught in the gears. Once again with a subtle touch another one emerged from my infested transmission. It is two, two mints in one. I just hope my transmission does not turn into Kate and John plus eight, two is enough.
My only option is to call in a priest to exorcise the transmission. The last thing I need is green goo spewing out the PTO opening. Well the bag demons are exorcised and after a quick trip to Fastenal to get the correct bolts, the cover plate is on and I am looking towards to the next step.
It will be a miracle if this truck runs when I get done, how could I get two plastic bags in the transmission and not know it. But, I know if I pay separate shipping and handling they will send me another truck. I just hope they include a case of IPA for lubrication.
