It’s Never Over

It is that time of the year in Alabama were we have the hot muggy days and the temperature is in the high nineties. It makes you think you are on the African Savannah. Still, there is nothing much better than working in the man cave on the truck project.

Dr. Dale was out on rounds last week and came by to check up on the truck. I have to admire his commitment to the project.  I was pretty proud about the amount of parts already assembled; brake drums, drive shaft, bell housing and steering components. Well Dr. Dale was not really happy with the rusty brake drums and rusty drive shaft, clearly it was not acceptable. The next thing I knew I had a prescription to paint my parts.

Like any patient that doesn’t like the diagnosis, I wanted a second opinion. I pleaded my case to Dr. Brian, my other mechanic friend, and to my great surprise; he too said I had to paint all my parts. It’s a conspiracy. Why, I asked?  Now this is the true story, he explained that if I just happened to stop the truck over a mirror, people would be able to look up at my trucks private parts and it was just not lady like to not have them painted.  Remember what your mother said about always wearing clean underwear, you just never know who will see yours. At this point I figured I had enough opinions and went to the paint store.

Thinking of the Queen, I dedicated the weekend to cleaning my parts. First the wire brush, next the Purple Power degreaser, which was followed by brake cleaner.  My team of advisors said that Barbeque paint was the best paint option because it would stick to the rust and handle the heat from the braking action.  I have to admit that the parts do look good. But you all know I am a sucker for those little black numbers.

While my Hillbilly garage has its good points, it does not really keep all the moisture off the truck.  This fact comes to my attention as I am working on the brake drums and notice that rust is coming through the paint and in fact the spot where I was working, the Barbeque paint was rubbed off. Lord Jesus Mother of Mary, all my hard work for naught.

My theory is that there was still a grease residue on the parts and that prevented the paint from properly bonding. Now I have exactly what my Mother feared, holes in my underwear.

And it is not over, I still keep finding dirty rusty parts that need cleaning. The bed parts, among others need to be prepped. It will be a long summer.

I am going to be so glad when the Baboon Phase of this project is over. You know, the phase where you sit around on the hot savannah cleaning your parts.

Meat for the ¾ Ton Truck

There is nothing like small town neighborhood customer service.  Jacob from the Goodyear shop came by last Saturday to help me determine the correct tire size for my special needs truck. These lifelines are really saving my bacon. After analyzing the partially assembled truck he recommended a 245/70R16.  I told him I was secretly hoping he would say that because it was the combination of my high school locker.

I dropped the rims off and they ordered the tires. As fate would have it I was out of town on a business trip when the wheels were ready to be picked up. My gracious wife took the Prius to the shop to pick up four huge tires and the guys in the shop loaded up the car. If they tied Granny Clampett to the roof it would have been perfect. When Stephanie was unloading the tires, she let one roll off the back of the car. Well that tire hit the pavement and since it was full of flubber, it bounced up and smacked her in the face. She is okay and the tread marks go well with the missing tooth.

I got new meat and this little 54 Truck is ready for some hauling. Did he just say “meat”? Most definitely, meat is a term I learned as a kid in Colorado and is slang for tires, mostly used in drag racing. I double dare you to Google it.

I really can see the potential in this project and am ready to hit the road.

Of course there is still lots of work left to get the cab in shape.

Wild Weather

We have had our share of bad weather in Alabama this year, killer tornados, wind storms, and our regular punishing storm fronts. All in all, downtown has survived and avoided major damage, well mostly.

A storm front came through the other day while I was at work. Hey no big deal, we get these every week. However, when I got home I found that my Hillbilly garage was demolished. I am sure some neighbors would have been glad for it to have been blown all the way to Kansas.

Oh well, at least with my camouflage tarp I can use what’s left as duck blind. I think the Northern Truck Duck is in season.

Now y’all remember how pretty it was before, it was so nice we even had parties on the truck frame. Everybody has a little red neck in them.

I did have a spare tarp and surprisingly was able to resurrect the shade tree garage in a few days. That is one mighty fine truck you have there Mr. Sherman.

This is Hillbilly Heaven, what could be better.

What A Day

The frame is mostly done; the suspension, brakes, drive shaft, and transmission are all installed. Next is to get the tires and put this baby on the road. In order to select the correct tire size, believe me there are a zillion, we need to do a test fitting of the body on the frame so we get the tires sized correctly.

You ladies will understand this, one has to put on the dress to pick out just the right shoes – do I get the strappy Jimmy Choo’s, the sassy Candies, or maybe the little black Goodyears.

Step one of the test fit is to install the cab, remember this is not an ordinary cab. It is a Five Window Cab, baby. We use an advanced body shop technique to put the cab on the frame, the Egyptian litter-bearer method. I rounded up the Lowry men and with Dale we made four. Using two 2x4 boards we picked up the cab and dropped it in place.

It is hard to believe but It took only four bolts to attach the cab to the frame. Next, Dale and I attached the front and rear passenger side fenders and the result was unbelievable. Anubis, Ra, and Osiris were surely smiling on us. After ten months of working on the frame, the truck came to life, just look at the pictures.

Now we can select the proper tires. The key is to get a tire that is proportional to the wheel well and fenders.  I am thinking of a little black number.

Well as good as it looks, sadly it is just a test fit. Dorothy don’t look behind the curtain you might get some oil spots on those Ruby Red Slippers.

The Rear End is Near

With the rear springs installed, thank you very much, the next part is the rear end. As you can see in the before picture below, this is one big rear end, I am talking J.Lo size baby.

The challenge is how to get the 400 pound rear end under the frame and into position. I have my “professional” reinforced dolly, my old man back support – just like they wear at The Home Depot, a hydraulic jack, many blocks of wood, and Preparation-H. All and all it worked out pretty well. With a few ups and downs, I got the rear end positioned properly and installed the U-bolts.

Okay, it wasn’t quite that simple, I first had to go through the spacer conundrum. It turns out GM used the same rear shackle for many models. The way they did this was to use a spacer to accommodate the different spring sizes. The conundrum is – which side does the spacer go – Port or Starboard? Let me translate the nautical analogy, the right way or the wrong way. The 1954 Truck Shop Manual which uses bold italics for important instructions stated that the spacers were on the inside of the shackle. Now for the hyperspace discontinuity, the 1954 Factory Assembly Manual shows the spacers on the outside of the shackle. She loves me, she loves me not, she loves me…. Well I went with the Shop Manual instructions because I am a sucker for italics.

You got it, they go on the Port side matey. So once again I get to take it apart, move the spacers, and reinstall the springs. Belisima perfecto!

Yeah the rear end is on.  In celebration I turn the u-joint pinion shaft a few times just to see the wheels turn, well it just seems like too much play.  I mean I can turn it a mile and it seems to make a lot of noise. Brimmer is learning to listen to the little voices in his head - something is not right. So I use a life line and walk over to the Goodyear shop and ask them if they work on rear ends, my hope is a mechanic will come over to take a look. But no, they don’t work on them.  Now I am desperate, I use a mobile shout out and call Richard, he is gracious enough to come over and take a look at my rear end.  After he looked at the backlash, tolerance stack, reverb, and general wobbliness, he said the rear end was tougher than me and there was really nothing I could do to break it. He gave me a clean bill of health and the rear end is in!

Next were the rear shock absorbers and it’s always something.  The bolt that holds the shock to the bottom hanger is 5/8 inch. That’s right and the hole in the hanger is 5/16 inch.  Something ain’t right. Well I can make the hole bigger or get smaller bolts.  Since they don’t sell the huge ass drill bits at The Home Depot, I opted for the smaller bolts, which to my surprise they had in stock.

With the rear shocks installed, all I had left was to install the last section of the drive shaft.  This went on without any problems.  Now I am nervous, because that means I did it wrong. The picture shows the fruits of my labor.

The old 1954 Chevy Truck has some serious booty.

The before picture shows how much progress was made.



Rear Leaf Springs

The big day has finally arrived; the rear leaf springs from Posies are mostly done. I received and email stating that the springs were just about finished and that they would be shipped in a week. When they shipped, the UPS tracker showed that they spent a few days in Atlanta; I sure hope they picked up some of my favorite Sweetwater IPA.

Orlando, the UPS person dropped the springs off and even put them in the back yard for my wife. Of course this was after he checked to be sure the dog was inside. The other day he dropped off a small package, but since our dog Abby was on the porch, he just stood by the truck, holding the package out from his arm. My wife had to walk across the street to get the package. I would probably be cautious of dogs if I was the UPS person, too.

I did a quick test installation of the springs and they fit perfectly, well mostly!

With all the delays, Posies did not charge me for the U-bolts and bushings. That was nice of them, but they shipped the wrong size U-bolts which meant that I would have to cut them to the correct size. Well that is nothing for an Ace Mechanic. These U-bolts looked like they were two feet long, oh well; it takes the same effort to cut off an inch as it does to cut off a foot. Just ask Lorena Bobbitt.

On to the next problem, my bushings are too small.…  Below are the rear shackle, the shackle bolt, and two too short bushings. Billy Mays must be just around the corner. Anyway, Posies agreed the bushing were the wrong size and sent the larger ones, much to Stephanie’s delight. My friends at R&R Speed Shop pressed the bushing into the shackle and man it doesn’t get any better than that.

The spring installation was easy, hang the shackle, insert the shackle bolt through the spring eyes, and stand back to see the good news. Just look at the before and after pictures, progress baby! Next up is the rear end and brake lines.

Happy Day

    



But Wait There is More!

Billy Mays is no longer with us but his spirit has visited my transmission.

In the quest to remove unnecessary equipment and weight from the truck, I took off the Power Take Off unit (PTO). As you can see, I used my Barbie duct tape to cover the opening until I could locate the replacement PTO cover plate. One must cover the opening; I didn’t want any illegal aliens to get in much less any water or foreign bodies.

Last week I was proudly showing of my master mechanic craftsmanship to another car aficionado and was turning the drive train to show how well everything fit together. Halfway through the turn I felt it tighten up. The little voice in my head said “this is not good”, even my friend noticed and pointed it out. I turned it a few more times and while it did turn through the tight spots, I was concerned. However I decided to use the advance mechanic Ostrich method of altered reality and pretend that nothing was really wrong.

Later that week I took off the protective duct tape as I had successfully located and purchased a PTO cover plate and felt safe that nothing was going to get into the transmission. A business associate was over for dinner one evening, Sam Adams from Boston, this is not his real name since we need to protect his identity. Sam and I were checking the truck fluids and I use illegal high test SAE 30 IPA. Mr Adams has two boys and if they knew how many quarts of IPA we used, well…..  Now this is where it gets fun, I am turning the drive train and something sticks out of the transmission opening.

Okay, this is interesting. I carefully turn the drive train and a whole plastic bag exudes from the transmission. Where did this come from?

Well that explains the tightening when I was turning the drive train. As my memory started to focus I remembered putting a plastic bag in the PTO opening before I sealed it with the pink duct tape. I was just trying to be extra careful when trying to seal the opening.

But wait, there it more!!!

I just happened to notice another illegal immigrant in the transmission. A second bag was caught in the gears. Once again with a subtle touch another one emerged from my infested transmission. It is two, two mints in one. I just hope my transmission does not turn into Kate and John plus eight, two is enough.

My only option is to call in a priest to exorcise the transmission. The last thing I need is green goo spewing out the PTO opening. Well the bag demons are exorcised and after a quick trip to Fastenal to get the correct bolts, the cover plate is on and I am looking towards to the next step.

It will be a miracle if this truck runs when I get done, how could I get two plastic bags in the transmission and not know it. But, I know if I pay separate shipping and handling they will send me another truck. I just hope they include a case of IPA for lubrication.