Prime the Hood

Uncle Remus, Uncle Remus, tell us what happened this week in the Hillbilly Garage. Well chrin, I worked all weekend on that ornery 1954 Chevy truck and by golly if I didn’t prep and spray primer on the hood and get the front fenders mostly done. Zip-a-Dee-Doo-Dah, Yippen Farcheesy and Roll Tide. Mostly done is okay as it is progress, but I am going to be so happy once I start getting things really done.

When I was in the construction business there were a couple of sayings we commonly quoted. One was “straight like Apache arrow”, the meaning is self evident and it is a useful saying when you are doing leveling and plumbing tasks. The second one was “smooth like mamma’s xxx”. Several options can be used to fill in the blank, they all highlight the posterior aspect of the feminine form. This saying is often used to describe finely finished work that has a smooth and highly polished surface. It takes years of hands on experience before one qualified to make this statement. The “smooth like…” saying crosses over from construction to the automotive vernacular - body work is a tactile sensory enterprise in any industry.

It feels like I have been working half my life on the front fenders, finally they are almost to the smoothness point of the aforementioned saying. Spray on the primer, sand the primer, run your hand along the surface, repeat until it is “smooth like…”. Only one more coat, I promise.

The hood has been another epic piece of work. Both Stephanie and I have sanded our fingers to the nubs, working to get it prepped. As a last resort we used rust eating chemicals to assuage our rust malaise.  The use of chemicals is a double edged sword, they eat the rust, but getting them to stop is problematic. Water will wash off the chemicals but then the hood starts to rust all over again. Since I haven’t been able to prep and paint in one weekend, the pristine hood on Sunday is covered with a fine patina of rust by Saturday. It is a never ending cycle.

This weekend I finally neutralized the chemical cocktail, sanded the hood to bare metal, and sprayed on the etching primer - it was sweeeeet!  But wait, the paint was acting up.  I have read about the problems one can encounter when on the spray paint road. To wit: fish eye, blistering, crazing (my personal favorite, in fact I want it), pin holing, orange peel, and mumbly peg. Uncle Remus you forget to include “sagging”? Why my oh my I did skip that one, cause that’s what I gots – the sags. Technically speaking the coefficient of paint adhesion was exceeded by the verticality ratio to the volume of material that was incontinent with the reduction additive. In English - I sprayed to damn much paint on the damn part. Not to worry, at this point it can be sanded out and all will be well in the briar patch.

Still it was a glorious weekend and progress is progress. Another saying I like is: Man with respirator on is one thirsty mechanic.